Honestly...on honest about honestly not writing

Whew dusting off the keyboard over here. Really and truly...I couldn't find my charger, then my computer needed an update. All this for one tiny post in the new year from your favorite Seattle Stripper. So much has happened in the past what half a year since I've written anything. I did another podcast but not for the Migscast. Although I love those guys and would love to see them again. This one even has a video of me so if you want to hear me being far to shrill look it up. I suppose everyone hates the sound of their own voice so whatever. I told myself in the new year I was going to make myself write. I feel like most of my posts at this point are about that. I never do it. This time I am. I need to start winding down after work a little differently. I mean I've watched everything on netfilx at this point so it's time to actually be productive, do more writing and more reading. Lately with books I have this problem if I really like them. I don't really want them to finish so I stop reading them when I get too close to the end. I mean really how much more ridiculous could I get. That being said any good book recommendations I'll take them. Oh one big major change in my life that affects all of you. I've moved clubs so if you are in Seattle on the weekend come by Deja vu Showgirls in the Market. I love this club. It's got a way better vibe, it's got way less drama than little darlings. Management is actually sane, and fair. Also I finally paid off my backrent at ld's and as soon as I did jr. had the balls to say to me "enjoy it for the day you have it, because we will charge you more don't worry" why would you say that. All the more reason for me to end my contract there right now. Like my forever contract. Really I should head back to Portland also things I say every time I write. Although I don't know if that's even a possibility since my ex bestfriend has made that her home and I really don't feel like dealing with allllll that right now because she is not the nicest person and shes easily pissed off. However looking at her social media it looks like shes doing well down there so I should probably head down and see whats going on. Last time I spoke to her it was still cracking down there. So I guess Feb is when I'm going to try and head down and see what I can do. Although since my bike was stolen (should anyone want to buy me a very small frame of the either 2007 or 2008 bianchi eros donna in acid green, not bianchi green acid although they also made it in pink, I would totally accept pink, I wouldn't be mad at all) ( yes that happened too someone stole my bike out of our "secure" bike parking, and my apartment manager told me I never should have parked it down there when I asked her when I first moved in if it was safe and she said it was secure and refused to do anything about it) it makes getting around Portland a little bit harder, although maybe that will be my goal for the month, save up money for rent (obviously), hotel in Portland, and a new to me but old to everyone else bicycle. Seems strippery enough right... Anyway that's enough boring you for now. I have to get ready since I promised myself I would go in early tonight since the last few nights have been lackluster. Also if you want to hear jokes from your fave and most attractive, but not to into themselves stripper tonight or the rest of the weekend...you know where to find me.

Abandon ship....

That's basically what I'm doing with little darlings at the moment. I've spent two Saturdays at showgirls as of late and it has been amazing. I've been able to be myself. I've been able to make money, which is awesome. Also everyone is incredibly nice. It's be absolutely amazing. So please feel free to come down on Saturdays and see me. I'm not sure about next weekend so a friendly face would be nice. Also I've just been killing it, and having fun with customers, although some of them are a little more bro-ish and I have yet to figure out how to deal with that crowd. Although I've found the crowd to be more diverse and also a little more to my personal taste. It's also nice since the entire club is run by women, and there was an incident at little darlings last week that I still haven't talked about...Don't worry it's coming and the story my L look like an angle and N look like the biggest jerk in the world. I'm so much happier at showgirls, the dances are out in the open they can see if you are dancing so there is no way you can be over marked unlike N's idea which is "if she walked back there and I didn't see her she was giving a dance" when everyone knows you don't start in the middle of a song. Also showgirls has their pricing together, it's not dirty, it's just an all around better environment and even though I get stressed out going. Once I'm there I'd so much rather be there than anywhere else. K and W are amazing managers and I love working with them, they are fucking amazing, the dj is the same and still super nice, and kinda goofy, the bathroom holy fucking shit even though the bottom part of the door is cut off and that legit so someone doesn't hog it, has a mechanism to keep it closed you don't need a trash can, it's amazing, part of me wants to cancel my contract at ld's and just work gamedays and dreamgirls and the rest of the days at showgirls. Little darlings is a sinking ship, and although it's been my home for many years and provides me with endless entertainment I think it's time to jump ship so my last year-months-weeks, can be productive and actually pleasant, not worrying about if I can make house rent, or anything like that which I worry about every single night at little darlings. Lately, one day a weekend being good has been carrying my weeks, so all my bills, groceries, any stupid little thing I buy that I shouldn't since it's only one good night, my rent, it's crazy...a stripper should never live like that. We didn't sign up to be broke ass bitches. I know some of you are going to say, "if you aint making money, you aint made to be a stripper", and that's not the problem, the problem is Little Darlings itself. So that being said I'm going to try to be more active on social media and let you all know where I am. Thanks everyone as always.

dating a stripper

This is one of my favorite topics it's also click bait...sorry everyone. Okay have you heard the saying don't shit where you eat. That stands double in a strip club. If you work in a club don't date your coworkers...it's already hard enough making friends. I'm lucky that I work at a club where It's not hard to make friends and friends you can trust at that. Anyway dating strippers...you can do it if you work there because you understand the business and if you don't mind then you are fine...however... However if you are new and you happen to find yourself as one of the males dating one of the more prominent strippers who's been around for a while and has a reputation for a bad temper it might be best to be polite...hold open doors. Don't automatically sit in the front seat. Don't dj your girlfriends sets with music they would never ever, ever listen to...play for the dancer and the crowd. Be polite. Maybe don't talk shit in the car on the way to a destination, because I can tell you right now, you are not winning points by all of a sudden moving in in with her, talking shit about the rest of us in the car, because not only are you losing points for Hufflepuff, we can all walk, we don't need to interrupt your time. Also when arriving at the destination don't question the core group of the girls or insult them. Also be gracious to your host unlike us they are your actual coworker, we are just freelance, but respect those that helped you learn the ropes. Lastly, when your girlfriend says she just wants to pop by then drop her girls off, don't sit down and play video games, and not save the game...also don't upset the hosts brother so much he doesn't even want to do his happy dance...because that's what I look forward to. Lastly...and this is personal...do not under any circumstances call me or the general group that I am in a mother fucker or mother fuckers...because bro...now I don't like you...and I know you don't like me...and as I usually do to I have absolutely no problem not talking to you to avoid an future problems...the only real problem is now you have come between me and my friends, because as shes trying to get you to leave with her you would rather play video games and yell at her that she can take her friends home and come back and get you that's such a waste of fuel and truly shows where your priorities are...and they are not with her...I now think you date her as a place to stay and to stave off loneliness. Also I would rather walk home now than be in the car with someone who is so disrespectful. To my dear friend...over all the years I have known you and all the times you have told us our relationships are crap, or we are dick whipped because we don't want to party, when you chose to watch your boyfriend play video basket ball...it also shows what kind of person you are becoming and should you happen to read this I would like to have a long talk with you about how hypocritical you have become...because as you said...I've known you way longer than he has...I'll still be here when he breaks up with you but damn girl don't ever come at me sideways if I like someone again...and don't shit where you eat.

marketing...and sales...and a bad memory

I'm told constantly I should be in sales or marketing and the truth is I should I fucking rock that shit. The thing is it's hard to sell someone in sales that you can sell a dream...but I can and I'm a master marketing agent. Truth be told I am I'm working on getting out of the industry...surprise...don't worry you have time. I'll keep you all very updated as to whats going on in my world and when I'm leaving. You've all got plenty of time to get to seattle and get dances. anyway lets have some stories...I can tell a marketer by their glasses shirt, and shoes, I had one come in tonight promise me he would pay me more money than anyone else, if I sat with him...oldest trick in the stripper book to try and get them to sit with you for no money. I have a three song minimum that's 15 minutes...that like $200 I could have made or made part of. Anyway...this guy goes on and on about how hot and cool I am and just wants to spend time and all the money he has...which turns out to be $20 he tipped me on stage...a word to the wise... if you can't sell it in 6 minutes bounce. Also tonight I made a fool of myself with a regular again. I can never remember his name. However I can always remember your life story when you get to a certain point in the conversation except...I've commented the same thing on this guys shoes 4 times in a row and never remember...it's the first time I felt like I was blushing and wanted a coat. I feel so bad when I don't remember people who take the time to remember me. so if you are reading this know you are now committed to memory.

death catches us all

So I haven't been around much. My mother died. Yes she knew what i did for a living. I even asked her to write a piece for my blog, and she might be part of the reason I quit posting I didn't want her reading about my life. Anyway I'm going to recap basically what she wrote and what I remember of her writing it "Being the mother of a stripper is hard you ask yourself where did you go wrong, then you ask her where you went wrong. "Stripping is not something I have any respect for, I don't find it noble" and I ask myself is there nobility in your life what was your purpose and who did you help? Not me...you spent my money and lied to me about it and your cancer...so tell me again how tight tops get me unwanted attention and it's my fault...tell me mom...how many husbands and wives have you kept together. Tell me I was wrong and tell me I was a bad person...but damn it...I showed up for your last breathes...knowing full well you fucked me over...She blamed a swim shop in the town she lived in that i had never been too claiming she the shop owner convinced me to strip...I had no clue what she was talking about... She never looked on the bright side that I was independent, that I wasn't scared of who I was, I wasn't meek, I could take on the world, the universe, the multiverse if I needed. That she taught me part of that, to be confident, to believe, to just fucking believe...and now I have to believe I can handle the death of someone who told me they wished I was never born, wrote such a horrid post I couldn't publish it, and yet...I showed the fuck up.

Tell me lies tell me sweet little lies...just kidding this is all truth

As you know I always talk about how awesome my job is and how much I love it, and how amazing it is and how nothing bad every happens. I'm also writing a book and not all of the book get to be about me shitting glitter, so here is some of the truth. Sadly I broke another Iphone so until I get the back up I can't post photos. Also my adroid sucks, and since I left it in a friends car I forgot to pay the bill, and it's been so bad Last time I did anything truthful I was asked to remove it from the internet why because it was true. Well kids, it's not sunshine and fucking unicorns being a stripper. Mind you I still love my job, but it's harder and harder to make money, without people wanting you to give them a blow job, hand job, or fuck them and all for insultingly low prices.It would be less demeaning to offer them money for sexual favors. The best part is the company or middle management cares not about us just the bottom line. I've been told I've been under counted for dances and gotten in a full blown screaming argument that the dance counter was correct...which he wasn't and that I was to have all my customers sign a piece of paper stating how many dances they had...which is illegal and upon questioning they said it was a suggestion, considering they know it; Side note we are suppose to be able to drink what we want perk of the job you know, however I had an Italian soda last night I forgot to pay for it's a whole two dollars...mind you I made a whole two dollars last night and got a call that it was an emergency that I make sure I pay for the stupid whip cream I used. Whip cream is 2.99 for a whole container...What the fuck..I got naked and can't get any whip cream...at the same time I'm not rubbing up on Lui....or sitting on his lap...but I can see why two dollars is important to him since he can't count. On the fourth of July she said we had 45 guys in 5 of which came when we 1st opened 4 of which were young 3 were just there to watch...one wanted to buy sex so 34 over 8 hours which is about 1 an hour and 10 girls...so I can see why he over marks me...also how is he suppose to make us feel valuable or really worthless and that we have no where else to go. I mean he does a great job of that, and I'm sure I'm going to get fired over this blog post. to be perfectly honest. The girls and I have been talking about chipping in and getting an ad in the stranger to promote for us, and a business snap chat and periscope, and you tube, and instagram and everything, I know I need a new and better phone for that, and discussions with those companies since we would be promoting a business. Also I we need funding for an ad. So if anyone out there in the internet word wants to help some strippers make some actual money we will pay you back, we just cant trust the company any more it says in the contract they will advertise for us and they don't so we need help and we need it bad. Also I need to make a power point on how to keep us a float and me from suing them for major breaches on contract especially with middle mgmt since I love upper mgmt. If they gave me little darlings. I could have that club turned around in 6-9 months, since I don't have a dick to distract me and I'm way more professional that the current manager, although that will never happen, but man I wish it would, I would have us making money hand over fist.

Another Night Another post

tonight we were drinking in the back and one of the girls was drinking tequila and I wanted her to try a vodka...then was like "I'm just over here switching dicks" It's the funny things we say to each other and the funny things that happen in an evening that keep us going...Like I had a customer who was a carpenter who I had a 20 min conversation about the usefulness of hotglue...which is very useful. I really think I need to start a podcast or, youtube channel just to get everything out and going. However it's hard. Can one use crowdfunding websites for that? Also it is worth it? Also the company thinks it's time to panic and is raising our rent and how we make money it's making it quite hard. Anyway Working on getting out, getting into marketing so any help from you folk is helpful. Also if I haven't spoken with you. I'm trying to be a better friend and in doing that I'm taking space from people because I don't want to hurt them...I also have a new phone and don't know how to use it.