Anyway I'm heading back to the midwest to see my parents, new sweater in hand, along with because I am a thrifty stripper a new pair or rather pricey shoes on a discount. Yes kids that's right I'm thrifty, why because I really do go to school, and yes I use this money for tuition. Surprise, surprise.
Ok back to why I feel bad for anyone that happens to fly with me. I typically take anxiety medication. I did though my bag till I fall asleep. I crave chips 20m minutes into the flight I'm totally annoying. I'm horribly needy. I'm chatty and I want nothing more than to think that I'm self sufficient, which I am not. Well I am. Lets start with some funny red on airplane stories.
As we all know by this time I didn't just move to chicago. I moved there for a business transaction otherwise known as the worst Idea of my life. (excuse me as the anxiety medication just kicked in.)
Ok funny stories about Red on airplanes.
Such as the time I was really hungry and found a bag of (opened) peanuts in the in the seat pocket, of course I ate the. Hands down most disgusting thing I am admitting to the public. What can I say I used to travel without a debit card.
I went to chicago and I knew as soon as I landed that I would have to meet the now ex's ex, so I decided it was a great time to get totally hammered, so I hung out with the flight attendants in the back and dumped an entire glass of wine on myself. That was one of those flights with the compassion of humanity came out. It is also one of the reasons I really enjoy flying delta. Those people were so incredibly amazing to me. There a are a few memories that I think about when I think about my time in chicago and I get really down on it as it was horrible and I remember all the really amazing memories that didn't involve the ex. The thing is if I hadn't had that experience I wouldn't be here. I wouldn't feel like my life was amazing and I wouldn't have the friends that I have. I would just be sad and miserable in the Chicago. (no offense Jason you were a pretty rad friend of the fucking idiot face that I dated, that I personally hope creates ugly children and fails at his job and gets really fat)
OK back to funny flight stories. I used to take my anti anxiety medication much earlier and there was perhaps a point where I took them and drank. I had this one time mistook my seat number as my gate number. With that error came thinking that somehow 3a was in the back of the airplane. Let me tell you it's not it's actually in first class. Also wearing a button down flannel jeans with rips, a leather jacket, and carrying a studded bag all while wearing the make-up from the night before is not the way you want to flop down into first class and it's not very classy but I did it and then proceeded to get the best sleep of my life next to a horribly conservative gentleman whom I felt very, very, bad for. I of course quickly got over that remembering that I am who I am and that I am in fact pretty adept in most situations, regardless of my garb.
I sat next to a Grandma like woman once who said I could sleep on her shoulder, she was an amazing and sweet woman who showed me pictures of her pets. She was amazing. Seriously flights restore my faith in humanity.
I also ended up on my last flight from Chicago sitting next to a 7 year old hispanic girl. We played hang man. She was amazing I bought us cookies and chips and soda. I also realized on that flight that my spanish was absolutely horrible, I have the ability to communicate with a 7 year old.
Ok maybe the drug haven't kicked in now I'm just really hungry for nachos. Stand by kids.
Ok no nacho's obtained but I do have junk food which gets me pretty pumped.
Which brings me to my next point for those of you that don't know I have been really sick for the past week or so so this week is my first week of eating normal food and I so pumped. Also for those of you that know my life is based around food and apparently sweaters. Ok now the drugs have kicked in I need to sleep.
No comments:
Post a Comment