Tuesday, January 10, 2012

I'm not just a stripper

Recently an acquaintance of mine became aware of what it is that I do. I hate it when this happens. People go from taking you seriously to thinking "Stupid fucking stripper." (Without Stripper being capitalized.) There are so many negative connotations that go with this job so this morning I've decided to go into detail as a little reminder that we are humans too. So here is a list of things that I am, besides a stupid fucking stripper.

1. I'm a student, like for real I get up I go to school. I go to accounting class everyday, it's boring it's not insanely easy, except that it is so I suppose that I'm lucky that way. I also attend a math class, okay so my scholastic activity isn't that impressive. It might be next quarter.

2. I'm a team player. Why? because I worked in an extremely hostile corporate environment for years. I know the value of having people being committed to a cause. In this case it's the hustle and when we all work together and have a good time we all make more money.

3. I'm a still life stylist, a fashion stylist, and the occasional art director. Boom, what are you doing today? I might not do it at the same level I previously did but along with taking time out to attend school I'm taking time to mostly if not completely rebuild my book. (This money has to fund a few things I suppose). I also still do the occasional closet edit, interior advice, and personal shopping for people. If you catch me on the right day I might just give out some off the cuff advice, or I'll send you an invoice. Again why? It's a business, and I could bill by the minute if I really felt like it.

4. I cook. Yup, that's right it might not be as much as I have had time for previously but I still cook. I might even cook you under a table. I don't mean that in the literal sense, I just mean I'm better at it than you...maybe. That's not for sure I probably haven't had your cooking.

5. I'm by the book. Anyone who has gotten a dance from me or read this blog knows what you can't touch and that I expect you to be a gentlemen, if you happen to choose otherwise have a good time explaining to your significant other that a stripper hit you in the face.

I understand the not taking strippers serious thing. Most of them don't read a whole ton, aren't watching the news (or reading it in my case, as we all know I don't own a television) don't ever look at the stock market. Don't see this job as a means to an end they just see dollar signs. This job isn't who I am, it's just that a job, a job I enjoy, but a job none the less. It has afforded me many opportunities I could not otherwise afford. It's introduced me to people I would not have met. It's also straight up and ruined relationships. It has taught me to be self sufficient. It has taught me to really be "Bigger than the sound." That people, places, and things come and go, and no matter what life will still go on, even if you don't think it's going to. That people will understand if you "just don't feel like working, today" Can you do that in your job? I didn't think so. Sorry sidetracked.

So the next time you choose not to take me seriously, please do me the favor and consider that I don't live in the strip club, I do wear clothes when I'm not there. I can spell most of the time. I'm not a raging alcoholic or a drug addict, I do however take frequent naps which is what separates me from being a normal member of society. Also I don't have so much make-up plastered on by day or pink sugar that you could look at me and know I was a stripper unlike some of them. Actually I don't do that at night either.

On that note. I'm going back to accounting homework.

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