Joint custody...

I woke up this morning to a beautiful view, in my beautiful home, with my beautiful dog. Something was bound to disrupt my perfect little morning. I was going though my social media crap, when it hit me, the ex had gone through and like some photo of us, which meant he had to dig to the bottom to find it. All I could think of was "why the fuck are you lurking my social media there fucktard" i am obviously over that douche canoe. This was on my mind when I walked into work, and a few things happened from there. In fact it was a strange night.

Which started off with a beautiful sunset...

 I sat down with a gentleman and begin gushing about my dog. So as we were trading pictures of puppies it came out that he was in the middle of a nasty break up and they had joint custody of the dog. I was immediately compelled to tell him the only story I know. Two friends of mine had broken up and maintained joint custody of their dog. The male side was very seriouisly seeing someone else, and it was rumored that he was still with his ex. These rumors were solidified when he chose to travel to California with her and lied to his then serious girlfriend, who apparently called him a few names, and left him. ANYWAY...now he is back together with the girl whom he had the dog with and they are getting married in just a few short months. The moral of my whole story to this man was that breaks dont work (believe me I've had breaks), break-ups do, space works, lots of space, space in which you discover that you are still in love with this person, that you can get past the petty shit and make it work. Hey handed me money for the advice or to get me to go the hell away. No actually he thanked me and agreed that I was right.

Second thing...smang it (look it up)

I had th opportunity to watch my stage I haven't watched it in a long time. I had completely forgotten what I looked like. I look smokin.

Third.

Rudest man Ive met in quite some time came in. He stated what time of race I'm into or not into. Stated that I was telling him what to do. He was just incredibly rude. Then he chose to insult my business practice of following the laws in Seattle. It's amazing how angry people get when you don't pull your boobs out. I find it so interesting that someone who practices law is so willing to break them wether it be with propositions of prostitution or purchasing drugs.

Oh my gosh. The other evening a man came in and said that due to the way I was dressed that it is justifiable to ask me to have sex for money. I let him make his points and retorted with..."So if I gave you 50 bucks would you fuck your friend?" he replied with "no he's into women" I then said "do you think I care if he is into women, money is money right." he then opened his mouth to say something and I cut him off with "you do realize your argument also suggests that women who dress proactively deserve to be raped. " he replied with "no that's horrible" "my dear so are your assumptions that I would fuck you for money"

Sometimes the shit that comes out of men's mouths is absolutely insane.

Following all this I ended the night playing a kazoo to marylin Manson whilst doing handstands. I'm fucking awesome.