Love like a thug...

I am eating marshmallows I made with my kitchen torch...why...because je suis le patron.

So there have been two fights in the past week at work. I wrote about the one between Nev and Baby.
Earlier Miami and Piper got into it.
One weekend Piper and I went to PDX and I had a huge convo with her about love and relationships. Someone she had previously dated told her that she loved like a thug because she didn't talk about her emotions that often and it took her a long time to open up. I know a lot of people think we have daddy issues, but we probably have just as many as everyone else, people just try to rationalize why it is that a woman would do this job...well because we are hot and we can. Anyway back to my point. I think it's more common in this industry for women to be more masculine in the way we emote that in others. I think that this industry pulls people like that in, because it is so hard. It's hard to be emotionally available to a bunch of strangers and adapt to a bunch of different situations really fast, and to make men like you. I know seems crazy that I would have a hard time making men like me but...hey no one is perfect. Her then partner said when they first got together they he would be pouring his emotions out and she would stand there arms crossed lips pursed one foot slightly in front of the other and one day he was like "You love like a thug" I couldn't stop laughing about it, because I knew exactly what he was feeling and what she was feeling because I feel like I'm the same way.

When the cheese and I were together there was one day we were having a discussion and he was telling me so much, just really opening up and taking a huge leap of faith with me...and I was wearing black ray-ban wayfarers...inside, I looked like that one emoji, I was being a total asshole, luckily it was still early on so it was still one of the things that was kind of cute about me, but ultimately one of the things that lead to a crash and burn.

We also solve problems the way men do at times, I mean there are a few of us who will talk it out, sometimes it seems as though we have to get into a scuffle to solve things. Right after Nev walked out of the locker one of the staff members said they were relieved that they finally had it out, considering how much tension had been brewing for over a year, and sure the conflict isn't totally resolved but now neither one can say the other is a punk ass bitch. Much like guys who get over shit quick after a fist fight strippers are the same way.
Nev's only thing now is that she really wants to prove to me that baby is lying to me. I mean maybe she misheard her because baby really wouldn't keep a secret about my personal life from me, and I'm sure she said I was dumb for wasting my time because I was, (which is something I have promised myself I'm not doing anymore.) but she said that to me at the time. She also told me about the night Nev is referencing...BUT I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY NEV whom has admitted to not like me flat out is trying to be friends with me or separate me from people I am friends with. I don't understand the political gain there.

I've been raking my brain lately. I know earlier this year I said I was going to do all this stuff with my blog...like move it, and I am, and work on my marketing, I am. I'm starting it now-ish. So in the next few months be ready for some changes. I've finally made most of my changes in my personal life to make it normal(ish) again. I just have to start getting up earlier. I swear it's going to start happening this week...the sleeping thing and actually following through on the blog move.

Thank you all for reading, I know I know some of you personally but I really appreciate you sticking it out through the rough patch.

That being said this week go visit your favorite stripper wherever she may be and tell her you appreciate her, cuz it aint easy being a stripper, athlete, therapist, escape, fantasy, friend, tour guide, spank bank material provider, stiletto walker, day sleeper, or to the moms out there non-sleeper, student, viagra, comedian. So tell her thanks, and give her $20, or I mean give her more I'm sure she won't be mad.