This is me bitching about some girls I work with and about the fact that people don't consider the fact that everyone is fighting their own battle. So excuse the rant.
Strippers live on one phrase there is always tomorrow. Well I guess two phrases depending on the time of day. There is always tonight. I'm banking on the latter at the moment and then the former after work.
It has been the year to end all years. I think I might have killed someone or something considering how bad my karma has been. It's funny, I think at this point I might actually be insane for still doing this job. I mean insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results right? I keep expecting people to do what they say they are going to do (and I know I'm not perfect) and I hope, and hope, and hope, and then I am let down. I'm so fucking tired of all of the things that people do and I know I do annoying shit too. 'm so fucking tired of presely incessantly being drunk every night and annoying the shit out of me, asking me if I'm okay, and saying I look depressed. BITCH I'm not, i'm just trying to get ready in peace please! IF I WAS DEPRESSED I DON'T WANT TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT IT. She really needs to quit drinking because even if you try to get a word in she cuts you off and tells you the same story she's been telling over and over and over again. We all know you are going to turn 30 and that you want to have a baby but you need to get sober 1st. We know you hate your roommates, and that one of them moved out and you are looking for a roommate but you yourself don't ever pay rent on time. Earlier when I was going to kick my interloper out, she literally said she wanted to move in with me, and that she is a great roommate blah, blah, blah, then no more than 2 seconds later was complaining about how broke she was and how she was not going to be able to pay her rent on time again. I'm so tired of the story of how her roommate tried to kill herself, I know I'm being insensitive but you are not helping the person who is obviously in need of some physiatric care if they are harming themselves by telling a bunch of strippers a story. I'm sorry her roommate tired to kill themselves, I really, really, am that's so hard on not only the person attempting but everyone around them. I really am sorry...But I was really serious when I said I didn't want to talk to her about it because my fucking now ex squatter tried to do the same thing on the 4th of July. I wanted to ask her how many knives she has gotten out of someones hand? Did they steal a bunch of your shit? Did they not clean your dogs face and then let it get all gross and painful? NO I'm sure they didn't. I mean maybe they did but whatever,
I'm tired of Versailles whining that the world is out to get her. It's not, you just need to actually work for what you want and make the best of a bad situation. She freaked out because she thought her boyfriend was cheating on her. I can now way in my life I don not put up with cheaters and the sooner you realize that in life the better off you are or you are just enabling the behavior and telling them it's okay to treat you like that, which will ultimately make a person feel like they aren't worth a shit. And the world sucks, there is something good to be found in every day, you just have to find it but otherwise it sucks and it's hard and it will kick your ass if you let it. She shouts all the time she's one of those people with no concept of volume at all. I wish they both would realize that life happens, and you can get yourself out of shitty situations. Yes you are dating someone shitty, stop doing that. Stop focusing on such small shit and you'll probably be happier. If I can get this far in this year I know she can do so much good for herself.
I'm tired of Nev starting drama. Last we she told me that she thinks it humbles me to tell me I can't get ready by my locker? She also told me that I need humbling since I don't own that counter....Actually I'm almost 100% sure I've paid the club more money than she has, so I think it is my counter. Also Really? Really? you think I need humbling I would say at this point I'm pretty humble and that's actually part of my problem at the moment. As for what's humbling having the red cross give you a $50 gift card to replace the food in your kitchen because everything was ruined by smoke, your entire pantry of special things ruined. $50 is 1 bag of groceries, maybe two if you are really stretching it. Then having them tell you, instead of helping you out by putting you up in a hotel, you can stay with your boyfriend...who just happens to be sleeping with your best-friend. I know the red cross is a donation volunteer organization, and I know there are plenty of people who really need help. I mean I really needed help at that moment, but I figured it out. That is fucking humbling. When your life and who you are is connected to your home and it is where you feel safe, and you are forced to move and your downstairs neighbor writes a 10 page complaint about you so when you are inside you tip-toe around and walk sideways so it's quieter and then you find yourself doing it in public so you have a complex about the noise you make as a 105lb woman. THAT IS MOTHER FUCKING HUMBLING.
Yes your life sucks too, I know because you put all your business on blast but you still have your kids, and your home. Also getting dirt on everyone to hold it over their head later is fucked up or making friends with people just to find out about other people is fucked up. We are suppose to be adults not in junior high. I mean I guess it's a strip club what can I really expect.
This year has been so crazy for everyone. Every day is a new day. Tomorrow I'm going to talk to Versailles and tell her life is not so bad. Hell I'm going to remind myself that life is not so bad and although I wouldn't repeat this year if you paid me a lot of money I have learned more about the cattiness of the girls in the strip club that I was so greatly oblivious to earlier this year. Now it's about navigating....and making money
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